Imagine a room full of your favorite people telling you what they love about you. Picture them gathered in a circle, each person going turn by turn and pouring out their love and admiration for you. I like to go back to the speeches from family and friends on my wedding day, remembering how wonderful it felt to bask in their affection.

Begin with the phrase “I love it when … ” and then complete the sentence. The key to doing this effectively, with detail, is to ask yourself five “Does it matter?” questions.

For example, if your sentence is “I love it when I am helping people,” then ask yourself:

Does it matter who the people are?

Does it matter when you help them?

Does it matter why you’re helping them?

Does it matter what you’re helping them with?

Does it matter how you’re helping them?

… Because there, in the detail, lives agency. There, in the detail, you can find yourself.

Here are a few more ways you can describe the detail of your Wyrd without bragging:

Over the years, I’ve found that I …

Other people tell me that I …

I get a thrill from …

I find I learn best when …

Some of my best times are when I …

But you should also learn a technique for describing your threads that aren’t red. Here, these sorts of phrases can be helpful:

I’m not at my best when …

I find I procrastinate when …

I seem to struggle with …

I’m drained when …

You are basically holding a book of me saying, “Wow, everything’s so amazing!” Or, “That’s not wow... Why not go with the wow option?