Over the coming weeks, we’d talk about what was happening to me. Being there but not really being there. Living a life of there-but-not-there hurt like hell.

My noble truth, I’m humbled to admit, didn’t come from within me. It came from the simple act of choosing to continue to live.

We ask: How, indeed, have I been complicit in creating the conditions I say I don’t want? More to the point, what am I willing to give up to stop being complicit?

See the stories you’re telling yourself about the other,’ I continued. ‘What do those stories reveal about the stories that you might have been holding quietly, silently, for all your lives?

This being fierce with the reality of what is requires the bravery to ask of oneself three challenging and yet powerfully liberating questions:

• What am I not saying that needs to be said? 

• What am I saying (in words or deeds) that’s not being heard? 

• What’s being said that I’m not hearing?