What did they know? They knew that human qualities, such as intellectual skills, could be cultivated. And that’s what they were doing—getting smarter. Not only weren’t they discouraged by failure, they didn’t even think they were failing. They thought they were learning.

The students with growth mindset completely took charge of their learning and motivation. Instead of plunging into unthinking memorization of the course material, they said: “I looked for themes and underlying principles across lectures,” and “I went over mistakes until I was certain I understood them.” They were studying to learn, not just to ace the test. And, actually, this was why they got higher grades—not because they were smarter or had a better background in science.

Instead of losing their motivation when the course got dry or difficult, they said: “I maintained my interest in the material.” “I stayed positive about taking chemistry.” “I kept myself motivated to study.” Even if they thought the textbook was boring or the instructor was a stiff, they didn’t let their motivation evaporate. That just made it all the more important to motivate themselves.

People change best by feeling good, not by feeling bad. Amy set herself up for success by thoughtfully using prompts to design changes. Those changes worked because they helped her do what she already wanted to do. And that success? That felt good.

It happened in steps. Many of her first steps were not about what but about who. Suppose you’re tossed into a leadership role for which you feel unprepared, and in which you find yourself lost in the fog without a clearly articulated vision for what to do or where to take the company. What steps should you take? Graham did what many great leaders do; she practiced the “First Who” principle: First get the right people on the bus, then figure out where to drive the bus. If you don’t know what’s coming down the road, your best bet is to have people with you who can adapt to and perform brilliantly no matter what challenges and opportunities come along the way. Step by step, person by person, hire by hire, seat by seat, Graham gradually assembled a busload of the right people around her.

She learned from Buffet in steps, cumulatively building a foundation of managerial and financial capability. Buffet would show up at board meetings with stacks of annual reports from a wide range of companies, giving Graham homework assignments to read them and build her business acumen. Graham dutifully did her homework, and then she and Buffet would sit down to discuss and glean insights about the ingredients of business performance. Then, at the next board meeting, Buffett would drop another stack of annual reports in Graham’s lap, and they’d repeat the process. Step by step, Graham built a foundation of financial competence and managerial excellence under the tutelage of her mentor. Keep in mind, she did this long before Buffett had become well known to the world as the Oracle of Omaha. She simply followed her encoded operating mode of getting the right people around her, learning from them, and then deploying that learning to great effect.