• Reinventing Yourself

“Most of the time, our working identity changes so gradually and naturally that we don’t even notice how much we have changed. But sometimes we hit a period when the desire for change imposes itself with great urgency. What do we do? We try to think out our dilemma. We try to swap our old, outdated roles for new, more alluring selves in one fell swoop. And we get stuck. Why? Because, as adults we’re much more likely to act our way into a new way of thinking than to think our way into a new way of acting. We rethink our selves in the same way: by gradually exposing ourselves to new worlds, relationships, and roles.

We like to think that we can leap directly from a desire for change to a single insight or decision that will complete our reinvention. As a result, we remain naive about the long, essential testing period when our actions transform (or fail to transform) fuzzy, undefined possibilities into concrete choices we can evaluate.

2: Possible Selves

“ Research on how adults learn shows that the logical sequence—reflect, then act; plan, then implement—is reversed in transformation processes like making a career change. Why? Because the kind of knowledge we need to make change in our lives is personal and situational; it comes from involvement in a specific context and with specific people, not from solitary introspection or abstract information gleaned from theoretical, general-purpose personality profiles. It can only be acquired by taking action.

4: Deep Change

“In the reinventing process, we make two kinds of changes: small adjustments in course and deep shifts in perspective. Often the first changes we make are superficial. We try moving into a new job, interacting with different people, picking up some new skills. Even when the need for a more profound change is apparent, its meaning can remain elusive. Small choices accumulate within a harder-to-change framework of ingrained habits, assumptions, and priorities. But after a while, the old frames start to collapse under the weight of new data. Sooner or later, the cumulative force of the small steps we have been taking requires a more profound change in the underlying framework of our lives.

Conclusion: Becoming Yourself

“The reinvention process challenges us to redefine ourselves. But, contrary to popular belief, working our identities is not an exercise in abstraction or introspection; it is a messy trial-and-error process of learning by doing in which experience in the here and now (not in the distant past) helps to evolve our ideas about what is plausible—and desirable. The most typical problem at midcareer is not defining what kind of work we find enjoyable and meaningful. Rather, it is figuring out how to transfer old preferences and values to new and different contexts and how to integrate those with changing priorities and newly blooming potential. It is a problem of recombining and reanchoring. And the “solution” is never the job change itself. Self-creation is a lifelong journey. Only by our actions do we learn who we want to become, how best to travel, and what else will need to change to ease the way.