Chinese philosopher Lao-Tzu, author of the Tao Te Ching, wrote, ‘The Sage holds on to the One and in this way becomes the shepherd of the world. He does not show himself off; therefore he becomes prominent. He does not put himself on display; therefore he brightly shines. He does not brag about himself; therefore he receives credit. He does not praise his own deeds; therefore he can long endure. It is only because he does not compete that, therefore, no one is able to compete with him.

Here is someone who needs to learn better how to let others have some power and influence over her without her feeling too dependent.

But you don’t always need to be cared for. You don’t have to justify your existence by caring for others. Instead of making mutual care an absolute principle, you could understand that need, absence, and ignorance allow wonder and new life.

You can trust them [emotions and fantasies], not to arrange life the way you want it, but to arrange the elements of your soul in a way that will offer rich life in the future.

Part of the pain of love is that no person, however suitable and satisfying, completes the desire for love. There is always a remainder, because love takes us beyond the human sphere. It puts you in touch with the ultimate object of desire. It invites you to transcend yourself, to be more than you ever have been.