Think of the best feedback you’ve ever received. Why was it so meaningful to you?

I’m willing to bet that the reason you remember it is because the feedback inspired you to change your behavior, which resulted in your life getting better.

In order to design successful habits and change your behaviors, you should do three things.

• Stop judging yourself.

• Take your aspirations and break them down into tiny behaviors.

• Embrace mistakes as discoveries and use them to move forward.

Behavior Design recognizes this reality: A key to lasting change is matching yourself with behaviors that you want to do. In your quest to exercise daily, for example, you’ll find plenty of options. If streaming Beyoncé and dancing for five minutes while you make breakfast is the exercise you want to do, then make dancing a daily habit. And forget about the treadmill at the gym.

People change best by feeling good, not by feeling bad. Amy set herself up for success by thoughtfully using prompts to design changes. Those changes worked because they helped her do what she already wanted to do. And that success? That felt good.

The feeling of success is a powerful catalyst for change. Your confidence grows when you celebrate not only because you are now a habit-creating machine but also because you are getting better and better at being nice to yourself. You start looking for opportunities to celebrate yourself instead of berating yourself.