Thatâs when the third level, collective judgment, zaps you: Youâve broken a social rule; you should always look happy and prosperous. Enter the fourth level. You feel bad. Itâs bad to feel bad. You are bad. The judgment judges the judgment, and lays the blame of you.
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There are four levels of the negative kind of judgment: self-judgment, judgment from others, collective judgment, and judgment judging the judgment.
The third level of judgment is not one particular voice but a set of collective voices. Fashion establishes hemlines, nationality establishes food and beverage patterns, social class establishes decorative taste, etiquette establishes which fork to use. These invisible voices also operate in your life as a source of judgment; you are likely to conform to their dictates blindly or feel guilty if you donât.
Your defense is not necessarily to ignore or disobey these voices. Many such ârulesâ offer handy guidance and eliminate constant fussing. But it is necessary to recognize each collective voice for exactly what it is: an external standard of behavior. It is also necessary to know that a collective voice is only a pretender to power. You still have the freedom to govern your own behavior.
When our stories require us to pass judgment, to inflict shame on ourselves and others, to set ourselves apart, we cause harm. Bigot, prig, the voice in my head calls me. And, I must answer honestly. I must answer yes. I want to make it not so. I have work to do on myself. I need a new story.
Designers learn to have lots of wild ideas because they know that the number one enemy of
creativity is judgment. Our brains are so tightly wired to be critical, find problems, and leap to judgment that itâs a wonder any ideas ever make it out! We have to defer judgment and silence the inner critic if we want to get all our ideas out. If we donât, we may have a few good ideas, but the majority will have been lostâsilently imprisoned behind the wall of judgment our prefrontal cortex has erected to safeguard us from making mistakes or looking foolish.
Iâm always interested in what others, and not just the esteemed critic from The New York Times, think about what weâre doing. If your business involves making people happy, then you canât be good at it if you donât care what people think. The day you stop reading your criticism is the day you grow complacent, and irrelevance wonât be far behind.